So I’ve been grabbing up some of those bags of used coffee groundsthat they give away for free at Starbucks. I’ve found that there is usually enough magic left in those grounds to make a few pots of quality coffee (for guests only). And, after the guests are through with their drinks, I like to go out and, per the instructions on the bags, spread the grounds on my tomato garden for fertilizer. The tomatoes taste great and, not to boast, I’ve been able to create some pretty amazing homemade marinara sauces! The only problem is that every time we have spaghetti at my house, I don’t seem to be able to sleep for three days.
Q. Dave, did you write a pithy version of the above story and submit it to Starbucks, in the hopes that they would print it on a coffee cup?
A. Yes. I was contacted by Starbucks, but the quote was not accepted.
Q. What did they say to you regarding your quote?
A. My quote was actually sent to the customer service department, where a very solemn representative asked me to explain my symptoms. When I told the representative that I wanted my quote printed on a cup, the representative (who was not amused) asked me not to submit any other great ideas.