Okay, so I just saw something that always bothers me – well, technically lots of things bother me, but this one especially. So, one of our neighbors just had a baby girl. I could tell you the baby’s name, the baby’s weight, length and birth date. How, you might ask? By reading the really big sign hanging from the beak of a really big wooden stork standing in my neighbor’s yard (here and here are some examples of the companies that rent these signs). “Why, Dave,” you might ask, “do these signs bother you?” Well, because there are a lot of freaks out there who have no business knowing your baby’s name and other pertinent information (here’s some good reasoning).
While I’m on the subject, how about those stickers that people have on thier cars (example here) that show the total number of family members and their names? Do you really – seriously, I mean really – want total strangers to know your children’s names? Think about it this way…if some freak wanted to take your children, he can talk to your child and tell them that he knows, using our example above, your daddy, Dave and your mommy, Carly, and, for good measure, he could throw in the fact that he once baby sat little Pierce, Kala and Amlya. Little Reichen, in our example, would be convinced that this friendly fellow must be a trusted member of the family because he knows everyone’s names.
The same holds true for your youngster’s sports team (example here). Don’t put thier name on your car. Strangers will know your child’s name if they are paying attention. Best bet…don’t give out needless information.
Well, that concludes my public service announcement and my last five hours of community service for passing gas near a policeman (see the precedent-setting verdict here). Thanks for your time.